So I have read many posts about various experiences and people simply just seeking the motivation to continue on. After all, it is a cold hearted and underpaid world out there and mostly the wrong people seem to get the shaft of a horrible experience. Others, cry for a inspirational motivator because no hope is left. Like what else is suppose to give.

I am high on spiritual but any transparent individual, real individual, will tell you it doesn't matter what your focus is on even, at times the universe delivers unto you what it knows you will benefit from even if its pay off isn't immediate and even of you can't see the gift it is eager to bestow.

I'll try to timeline my own progress:

*Birthing my 1st born at 17 ('91) and still finishing school and becoming a prioritized parent *Enrolling in computer technology school and becoming certified with credentials to sell myself ('96-97) *Attending community college classes,(psychology major)off and on, until my day jobs would cease my pursuitant sporadically *Landing a full time, career at a magazine print facility and working part time as a waitress while I pursued and attained my associates degree in psychology (2010) *Laid off from the magazine print platform which closed its facility that I worked at for almost a decade and landed a job at a major fast food dining franchise in Ohio at a corporate office, which I excelled in and was promoted for annually. *married and experienced a relationship with a narcissist who domestically abused me which lead me into resigning from my prior job and going into protective hiding ('13-17) *moved in with family, my daughter from marriage, to manage my divorce while I replanted my family into another city and would work jobs paying nothing to working 4 jobs to pull in the income i was use too while my daughter rode shot gun into this ride in our life, like a Champ! ('17-2018)

To presently temping a job and having a stable job paying decent on the weekend while I still strive for better. I've interviewed and came close to jobs like being the assistant to a mayor, executive assistant to a major corp., to an office manager at a major construction org., amongst many other jobs I showed up to interview for and was never hired.

Now, I presently work a job (temp to hire) as a CSR that literally loads work in the #1 candle manufacturing plant in the US. Pays decent but on a temping wage. The 1st day I realized only 4 people, Overworked, who schedule work in this 1million square footage plant have barely performed their duties through people getting burnt out while another quit abruptly. I find I am being trained by the Customer Service Manager who has no patience and training clearly isn't his strong point. He didn't even know my resume before I showed up for work, which didn't even pay my worth but times have been tough so I took it. He attempts to shovel his quickness in applications and processes I have no training on so that I just conceptually know until I abruptly stop him and bring his mind ful of mindfullness of this entire charade. He apologizes and says thank you for telling me, we're all on overload and I'm sorry but we will take it slow and give you time, as much as you need.

Today, I sat in my cubicle for 3hrs until 1 of the 4 were at a point to share some knowledge. I dunno why I'm here but I feel the need to share this. Stay strong, peeps....You Are Not Alone. Stay strong!