SUPER DUPER FRUSTRATED
After 8 months of applying to a lot of Admin positions I finally got a job! I was so excited. It's in a great area where I wanted to work for a long time. I'm so thankful and grateful for this job. God is good always. I was down to my last of everything and owed all my credit cards and bills. Before I landed this job I was homeless due to an amazing set of circumstances that I won't go into. Now you can understand how desperate I was for a job. However, since I've gotten the job which was in March, I've moved into a new apartment, caught up on some of my bills (not all and still have a long ways to go) and even managed to start a little savings account. Herein lies the problem. I'm totally and unequivocally unhappy in this new job. The job is great and my responsibilities are challenging but manageable. I started off working for 7 people and now I work for 12 people and with the same salary which is not much. However, the problem is my colleagues. They have their "clicks" and it's very uncomfortable. If I ask for any kind of help with a program or assignment, they go to the boss and tell him that I don't know what I'm doing. I try to join conversations, to no avail. I try to show myself friendly to no avail. I'm excluded from conversations (especially non-work related) there was a company outing and I went and boy did I regret it. We weren't allowed to bring anyone so I spent the time by myself. How embarrassing. No one even talked to me. When I tried to talk to them they were polite but made it clear they weren't interested in talking to me. I was in the bathroom and overheard the other Admins talking about me saying I'm not friendly and I don't talk to them! I'm at my wits end. I didn't get a job to make friends but it would be nice to have at least 1 person in my corner. I don't know what I did or didn't do. It's so uncomfortable that I'm seriously thinking of leaving but just can't afford to. Any advice?????
How do you consume the elephant in the room ( the elephant being the group of co-workers) one bite at a time! Start with one person and get to know that one, and you will start to see that you are breaking down walls with your co-workers!
Continue to work and give it 150% each day. Trust and believe it will get better. In your spare time, continue your job search.. there’s always other opportunities. When one door closes another one opens.
Best approach is people love to talk about themselves - try to initiate a conversation around hobbies, children, grandchildren, etc. Those are always good icebreakers. I have often me considered "antisocial" on jobs because I'm not a overly friendly person. But I've found that I need to get out of my comfort zone in order to make others feel comfortable. It can be a challenge and people should be able to express their own personalities comfortably but unfortunately everyone wants you to play the corporate game. Play the game and go home to your solitude. You're the newcomer to the company you would think the company culture would provide a means to make you feel a part of them and not the other way around. Goodluck!!!
Congratulations and I hope you have continued success in your new position!!!
Um you do need to make.some friends. I don't go out with the people I work with because they normally ate a lot younger than me but we talk and have a great relationship at work. You really should try to make friends it will make your tolerable job into that great job you love
Ugh Annette Abdelleh I have been in those positions before myself and I truly feel for you! It's certainly hard to grow and move forward when you aren't supported and made to feel bad. My advice is to focus on yourself, you've put in the effort and if they don't see the value in you then they are fools. You are NOT stuck in that job. Begin to look for others and apply. Take the time to update your resume and know from here on out that you will find a better work culture than the one you are subjected to currently. If anyone bothers you just politely tell them that you do not care to engage with their negativity. You've got this!!
Sometimes you just have to be the adult in those situations and do what you need to do. Every place has their "cliques" and that's never going to change.