Fear of Driving Holding Me Back
I'm in my late thirties and have never had a driver's license. Up until two years ago, I lived in a small city with decent public transportation, and although not driving was an inconvenience, I never felt like it was a handicap. I lived nearby schools, parks and shopping, and a major business district was a 15 minute walk away... where I worked in niche retail.
Two years ago, I moved to the U.S., to an area where everything is spread out among three small centers. Public transportation, other than an express route, is nonexistent, and although there is Uber, there are no cab companies.
I got my learner's permit last year, but due to being afraid, I didn't drive on it much and it has since expired. I am determined to work on getting my license, but it isn't going to happen overnight. I am going to have to work hard on overcoming a fear that has been fermenting for 20 years.
Problem is, in the meantime, my self esteem has taken a big hit. I feel ashamed and suffer an extreme lack of confidence. I'm embarassed to even start a job search without a valid license, but the fear of driving and the problems from not driving feel like they pull at me with equal weight. (Talk about the law of infernal dynamics!)
This is not my only challenge... I'm also a Mom with a gappy resume who wants to return to the work force. I have strong skills in writing and customer service, but haven't done much else.
I'm tempted to wait until I can get a license before launching headlong into the next phase, but circumstances may not allow me to. I have also signed up for classes at the community college in the fall... taking a blind leap that I will work out the logistics if it is meant to be. Is there any hope for me? Will anyone hire an insecure adult who hasn't triumphed over one of the most basic rites of passage?
Erin,
There is always hope regardless of what phase in life you're in. First things first, you have to stop living in fear which continues the cycle of insecurities. In this case, the fear of driving means you're afraid to catch up to this responsibility even though you're an adult. Don't let this hold you back from improving in areas of your life that need improvement because everyone progresses at their own pace, and you just happen to be starting a new path that is mentally overwhelming you. You've already established a structure (working on obtaining your permit and your upcoming school), now you just have to focus on balancing time management and maintaining your own structure to keep yourself moving towards accomplishing what you've set as priorities. Just because you've been keeping busy being a mom doesn't mean you don't have experience. Use your skills (communication, patience, etc.) of being a mom and apply that to your attempts to gain employment. It's all about your confidence and how you sell yourself at the same time you're improving yourself.
After all, you are only human, not superhuman. Best of luck!
I feel you. I am 34 years old and don't have a driver's license. I have had lots of deaths and accidents in my family dealing with automobiles.