Get a Mentor!

Ever look at really successful people and think they were lucky because so&so helped them, or attribute their success to some relationship in their life? I think we all have been guilty of that from time to time. But here's the thing... You can have that too. It took me awhile in life to figure out that it was MY responsibility to source and recruit a mentor. People are busy. Most people are very nice and helpful but life is busy and they just might not think about taking someone they don't know under their wing to nurse them along. But, when asked, they will likely JUMP at the chance. Most of us like to share the lessons our life experiences have brought us. And most of us are flattered when someone seeks out this guidance. So if you really want to get ahead - go find that mentor. Its pretty easy really - just follow these simple steps.

1. be honest with yourself of what you would like to achieve in your work-life.
2. figure out someone who has already achieved something similar- even better if they started in a situation similar to yours so that the road is about the same (but this part isn't necessary). Figure out about 3-5 of them and rank them. Note: do not pick someone you work for or in the company you are in. You need a mentor who can be objective about questions you might ask. A boss certainly is mentor of sorts -- but what you need is an outside mentor who will always be honest with you - especially when that honesty says "you should leave the company because you have grown as much as you can, and you need to move on".
3. Start at the #1 ranked person. And simply call them, or maybe email could be ok too sometimes. Ask something like this - but in your words/voice "Hi, I am calling because I would like to stop in and have a cup of coffee and ask you a question about my career. I really admire what you have achieved and I think if you could spare 10-15 minutes sometime in the next few weeks that it would have a real impact on my career. Might you have any time this month for that?"
   3a) if the first says no, or says yes but doesn't schedule it - move on to the next one until you find someone who says 'yes'
4. If yes - meet them, explain your objectives. Ask them about a near term decision you might have in front of you - either a challenge in your current role, or even the angst of looking for a new one or not. LISTEN. And toward the end of the meeting ask them if you might meet again.
5. drop them a thank you note - that includes you taking an action step based on something they said. Maybe you read a book they recommended. Maybe you handled a situation the way they suggested. Or maybe you just thought about something they said and it gave you an insight. Whatever it is - reference it. Successful people don't want to wast time - and knowing you did something productive as an outcome of the meeting will encourage them to meet again. Which is important because your letter will end with a request to buy them lunch sometime in the following quarter to thank them and followup with a few other questions.
6. At the lunch you may decide to ask them if you could continue to ask them questions from time to time in a mentoring type role. 4times out of 5 they'll say sure. Sometimes they'll confess a lack of time. Don't be upset at this. Its a sign of respect that they realize this is important for you but they simply can't work it into the demands on their time. You could either close by saying thanks or ask them for a lead of someone else. Then either start again with that lead, or with the next person on your list.

Its that easy. Do this and your sure to have a mentor (or 2) to help guide you to a more happy and lucrative work-life. And then you can smile when someone envies your success and says "boy they were lucky to be friends with So&So, that made all the difference".