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Debbie Hudson

Extremely frustrated

I recently applied for a position and received a phone call to set up a phone interview. This interview lasted about 30 min. I was told that I was one of 10 applicants out of 250 that was chosen. A few days later I received a phone call letting me know that someone else was offered the job. A couple months go by and the job is posted again. I applied again. I received another phone call and was ask to come in for a face to face interview. A couple weeks go by and once again the job is posted again. Now you must know that I have many years experience. I do not have a 4 year college education but I do have an Assoc degree. I am a humble person but yet I get upset when someone takes credit for my ideas. When it comes to interviewing I do not do very well. I really have no accomplishments to speak of that makes me stand out from others.
After seeing the job posted again I found an email address and sent them an email letting them know that I was still interested and that I was the best person for the job.
Now I want to tell you that when I went for the face to face I filled a permission sheet to do a back ground check that included stating my birth date. In my interview I was asked how long I intended to work. My answer was as long as I can. Now, most of the people working there I know and are older than I. Also , the CFO of the company asked me who my husband was. He and my husband has had a few run ins with each other which I was not aware of.
I feel that I might be overlooked because of this. I do not want to mention this to the CFO that just because he may not see eye to eye with my husband does ist mean I am the same type of person he is. We do business with this company.
Not sure how to proceed from this point.


Gala Werner

Good Day Debbie,

It is none of their business who your husband is. I have never been asked that. I would not say, sometimes you need to let a co. go, on their wicked way. I see jobs available that I applied to also... Let them go.. You are better and they just think it is funny to power trip. You do not want to work there, could you imagine?

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I too would say, move on. Our associations can impact our opportunity for employment. Also, by law, an organization cannot do a background check until they formally offer you the job. Good luck

Debbie Hudson

I look at all opportunities. But with all the rejections I am truly considering a different path. Every oppotunitiy that comes up I jump on it. I get the interview. I do all that is appappropriate. Sending thank you letters. Follow through phone calls. Emails. Nothing. Very discouraging.

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Take this update with your employers overall him and contact the department of labor/Afl.cio worker to tell about your situation.

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If I was you, I would just apply elsewhere because if the hesitation in hiring you is because of your husbad, I can see why they would hesitate in making you their employee. Husband and wife are considered as one and they may not understand the importance of The relationship, is between you two. That job is not the only one!!

Robin Baun

I'd look elsewhere. When people ask you about your husband etc., they could be just trying to get rapport with you, or else there might be something that I'd consider inappropriate going on, who knows? If you can't think of any accomplishments that you've had, you need to ask others you've worked with. I think they'll come up with things you've done well. To say you don't have any accomplishments I'm sure that's not true!

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Networking is everything at this stage in your career. It sounds like your husband is well networked. See if he can make intros to friends and avoid his enemies.

patricia pope

Than apply for another position. The CFO could be blocking you because of your husband and this in it self is hard to prove so chalk it up and keep moving forward. peace be with you.

Joseph Ferber

Obviously, the CFO is holding that against you - the run-ins with your husband. The CFO will NOT tell you that of course!

Nolan Snell

Holy cow. They are NOT allowed to ask you questions about your marital status- especially who your spouse is.

On the question about how long you were going to work- you should have given a nice big number- like 10 more years. As long as I can is too vague and allows the interviewer to wonder if you have a terminal disease or something. The background check is normal.

You might Google tips for interviews. There is a LOT of good advice on interview technique out there on the net, and you would not believe how little most people know about best presenting themselves.

The marriage question is illegal though and you might contact an attorney.

Denise Catlyn

Wow! I feel your pain when jobs are repeatedly posted and you keep applying for the same position. I have done that too. I would talk to the CFO and tell him you would like to keep it professional what problems transpired between him and your spouse please leave you out of it. Best Wishes and always keep God in your life first.

marcelle simpson

Let's start right off the bat, let that place go what done is done. May I say people in general have a hard time separating individuals when it comes to behavior and character flaws.whatever discourse went on between those two men its between those two only.Now what you have to do is start fresh A clean slate so to speak understanding this you are worthy for something better, what your mind conceive of yourself eventually that's who you become. Yes you are humble, but be also strong in spirit you must work on your insecurities because it shows in your interviews you have to become confident I think strong,speak strong,walk strong. Not arrogant but have assurance about yourself. You can achieve anything you set your mind to,if you Want bad enough you will find away to obtain it God Bless you take charge:)

Debbie Hudson

Even though I would have liked to work at this company I aways keep my options open. it just seems awful petty that a person in a high position within a company can be so low as to hold a grudge , for lack of a better word, against someones family or family member. To me that is unprofessional.
When you live in a small midwestern town options are pretty limited. Not many good paying jobs available.

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I have had the same type of instances happen for whatever reason. However, in your instance I think perhaps another hindrance for you would be the possible conflict between your husband and CFO. Not saying this is what he is doing as he may just be thinking it maybe a possible future conflict, but some people can be petty and vindictive no matter their level within an organization.

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does the cfo even know who your husband is?--that he IS your husband...that would be the key thing. If nothing else i'd reiterate in person how much you really want this job and WHY you'd be a good pick for the company. Otherwise if the history between he and your husband is an issue- it may be better to just move on to a different company to work for.

Debbie Hudson

I have already contacted him to let him know that I would be the best person for the job. I am sitting around was waiting for this job I am looking at different options.